What's in my Makeup Bag?

I'm not really the one to have expensive and luxury makeup, mostly because I can't afford it so I use a lot of high street, affordable brands like Rimmel, L'oreal etc. I do have the odd few things from MAC and other costly brands, however. Now that I have a job I can't wait to expand my makeup collection and buy a tonne of new things! But until I do, this is what I currently have in my makeup bag and use on a daily basis!

Rimmel Foundation £4.99 - Superdrug (other shades available)

Expert Face Brush £8.99 - Real Techniques @ Superdrug

This foundation is so good for the price! I use it in the shade light porcelain as I'm very pale and find it hard to find foundations that match my skin tone. This is the only high street one I've found so far that matches my skin so I've stuck with it as it's so cheap. It has good coverage and it isn't sticky but it comes off quite easily so I need to reapply throughout the day. I apply my foundation with the expert face brush (it's a bit old as you can see) by Real Techniques. I love these brushes. They're so worth the price. This one's a bit hard to clean, though. You can also buy sets of these brushes. 

Rimmel Powder £3.99 - Superdrug

Powder Brush - Sephora

This powder is simple and it does what it says on the tin! It's translucent so you can't see it and go dark but it sets your makeup just lovely and removes all the shiny bits. It's so light on your skin and you can barely feel it.

Touche Eclat Concealer £19.99 - Yves Saint Laurent @ allbeauty.com

I use this concealer under my eyes and at the corners of my nose. It hides my dark circles and blemishes perfectly and it just brightens up your face. It can be applied with foundation/powder but it's also great for those days where you don't want to wear any face makeup but still need a bit of coverage. I also use Collection's concealer, which is amazing trust me!!!, on my spots and blemishes. It covers so so well for being made by a cheap brand.

Rimmel Bronzer £5.99 - Superdrug

Blush brush £9.99 - Real Techniques @ Superdrug

I apply this bronzer under my cheek bones, on my T zone and under my chin to give me a natural looking glow because without it I look like a vampire because I'm so pale. It goes on very subtly with this brush and isn't heavy at all. 

L'oreal liquid eyeliner £6.99 - Superdrug

Mascara £19.50 - Benefit

Duo mascara £19 - MAC

Firstly, I use the 'They're Real' mascara to lengthen my eyelashes. This mascara gives your eyelashes a natural look (hence the name) and leaves no clumps behind. Then, I use the MAC mascara for volume. It has 2 brushes to give different effects and remove clumps. 

Brow pencil £6 - Topshop

Lipstick £15.50 - MAC

I'm not really a lipstick person as I don't think they suit me but this MAC lipstick in shade 'Politely Pink' is very subtle and not too bold. It blends in nicely and looks very natural with a tint of pink. This shade is perfect for the kind of people who don't suit lipstick but still want to add some effect and volumize their lips.

Naked Pallet 3 £37 - Urban Decay @ Debenhams

Finally, my favourite thing in my makeup bag! I love the Naked palette 3 and it just has so many gorgeous shades and can create so many different looks. This is actually an old picture as unfortunately, a few of the shades have fell out and broken :( This is definitely my favourite palette of the 3 (+basics) as I don't really suit dark, heavy eyeshadow but with this one there's lots of soft and light shades to choose from. I use a light shimmery colour all over with a dark, matte shade in the crease and then the lightest colour in the corner and under my eyes. Then I blend it all in using the Naked brush. This palette is quite expensive but definitely worth every penny because you get so much for it. They're brilliant quality, very pigmented and last so long. 

Jordan x 

Anorexia Recovery: A Year On

I've been meaning to do a post about my recovery but I wanted to do it when I significant reason to so this is the time. It's took me a lot to write this as I know a lot of people I know in real life will read this and it's quite personal so please be nice. TW- this post contains triggering material.

It's been around a year now since I started my recovery journey from anorexia nervosa. My symptoms were recognised early on by friends and family members so we seeked help together. This time last year, I had my initial assessment with CAMHS where I was diagnosed with anorexia (and other mental illnesses but that's for another post). A few weeks later I was moved to CYPS as they had special facilities and doctors for those with eating disorders and I could be treat better there. This time last year, I was deep in my eating disorder which was caused by a number of things, eating a mere 300-500 calories a day. By this point, I'd lost around half a stone since my eating disorder started. This doesn't sound like a lot but I was already at the lower end of healthy so losing this put me into the underweight category. My body had went into starvation mode and I was maintaining my weight on next to nothing as my body had learned to retain what it had.

June 2013

This time last year, I was miserable. I was slowly killing myself, both physically and mentally.  I was freezing, bones aching, hair falling out, blue nails- the list is endless. Not to mention I was depressed and I had also developed anxiety and suffered from panic attacks because I was starving myself. I also began purging and over exercising. I continued to lose weight but in late August, I went on holiday and things were looking up. I was eating more and gaining some weight but still purging.

August 2013

It wasn't until after my holiday when things completely spiralled out of control. I lost all the weight I'd gained and more. I was consumed by this awful illness. I just couldn't bare to eat. The voices in my head wouldn't let me. I was a wreck. I lost so many people around this time- friends and family. I was an awful, negative person. Not the Jordan people once knew me as. 

But then, in October, I decided to start recovering. I had weekly appointments at CYPS with my therapist and dietician. I had a meal plan and I decided to get my life back. I started slowly gaining some weight back and I was a lot happier. My panic attacks stopped and I was cutting down on self-harm. 

Around Christmas/New Year I completely relapsed and hit my lowest weight (at that point). I'd went back into the awful Jordan consumed by anorexia. Sorry for the graphic images by the way. I was emotionally and physically unstable. Anorexia ruined my Christmas and left me crying at the dinner table on Christmas Day. I was alive but not living.

After that I picked myself up and my New Year's Resolution was to recover and get healthy. So between January and June, my weight fluctuated but overall maintained- still lower than the Summer of 2013 though. I'm a very stubborn person and I couldn't let myself gain much and I still can't. However, I was eating more now though- around 1800 calories a day but I'd trained my body to maintain on that. Overall, I was a lot better mentally.

So, now that brings me to today- 2nd August 2014. I'm a much stronger person now. I won't lie, I still have my bad days sometimes but nothing like what they used to be. I have more good days than bad. I'm eating a lot more. I'm doing the things I want. I'm having fun with my friends. I'm getting my life back. I can pretty much say I'm recovered from cutting. Sometimes I do still hurt myself but it's been a long time since I've took a blade to my skin and I'm now over 2 months clean. I rarely ever get panic attacks now, too. 

I have colour in my cheeks and life in my eyes. I can truly say I'm happier. Being strong isn't about starving yourself, it's being able to overcome the thoughts and do what's healthy and eat. I am strong. I may only be 1lb over my lowest weight and I'm working on that but I'm overcoming the mental illness because that's what anorexia is- it's a mental illness. Remember that the physical weight loss is just a side effect. ANYONE can suffer from anorexia no matter what their weight. Anorexic is not a synonym for 'skinny'.

 August 2014

If you have any questions, feel free to contact me via Instagram direct message (@jordandakotax) or email: jordandakotaxx@hotmail.co.uk

Also, if you or anyone you know is struggling or showing signs on an eating disorder don't hesitate to talk to me or visit sites such as "Beat" which will offer support.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and if you are reading this, I'd like to say thank you to my friends, family and boyfriend for supporting me throughout this.

Jordan x

Trend: Summer Prints

We're over a month into Summer now and the weather is bliss in England which is a shock. So, obviously you have to dress for the weather and wear bright, bold things to match it because there's nothing worse than wearing Winter colours and print in the middle of Summer. Summer prints are all over the shops right now and I absolutely love them. They're so vivid and eye-catching. I've noticed that it's mostly striking floral and leaf prints that are in style right now and they're really popular. There's such a eclectic range of these prints too so it's never hard to find what you're looking for. So, here's a few of my favourite Summer prints from a variety of shops.

Missguided

Cami Swing Dress £24.99 - buy here

Cami Top £9.99 - buy here

Skater Skirt £14.99 - buy here

Wow, Missguided have really upped their game with their Summer collection. It's called "Tropicool" which can be found here. I'm lusting over this collection right now. There's such a variety and it was really hard to choose which ones to put on the blog. 

The swing dress has a mixture of bold and pastel colours which makes it so unique...and I love the cute little pom-poms at the bottom too. The print is super girly and it goes great with the dress which is very loose so it will keep you cool in the heat. This dress is so sweet and feminine.

The top is super bold and stands out. The colour is so amazing. I love the rich green- it's such a powerful colour and looks amazing on white. It really gives an outfit a boost and livens it up.

I love the soft print on the skirt. It's more of a subtle print with subdued colours which give it a romantic feel. It'd look great day time or night time and can work in many ways and give many different feels. I'd wear this skirt with a white tucked-in blouse and some soft-pink sandals.

Topshop

Playsuit £48 - buy here

Joggers £35 - buy here

Unfortunately, I didn't find that Topshop had a wide range of Summery prints this year which was disappointing but I did manage to find a couple of things from their Pacific Life collection which can be browsed here. Topshop can be quite pricey but I definitely think that the quality and prints of the items live up to a good standard. I also think that they, especially these two pieces, look quite expensive and high fashion for being made for a high-street brand.

This playsuit is to die for! I've seen so many people wearing this and I just love it. There's so much to it; the bandeau top, the skort with the split in the middle, the colours, the print... just everything about it stands out. I'm dying to buy this item (in hope that I can pull it off) because it's just my favourite thing in the shops right now. I've never really been in to playsuits much but this one is gorgeous and would work perfectly with the right footwear and accessories. It also features the bold green colour that has been used by Missguided too which just pops.

I like the joggers style that is about right now but I think the right pair is hard to find as some can give off a casual, laid-back but stylish look and then some can just make you look as if you've left the house forgetting to change out your pyjama pants. So, these joggers are very hit and miss but these one's are really nice. I have no idea but for me, they give off an oriental feel. I don't know if that's just me or if that was the aim... These joggers would be great on a cooler day paired with a vest top or tee and some sandals or trainers.

River Island

Swimsuit £30 - buy here

Tribal Bikini Top (top right) £16 - buy here

Floral Bikini Top (bottom right) £16 - buy here

River Island's Summer prints vary from other shops and they don't really stick to one or few styles throughout their collection. They don't feature their prints on much clothing, either but mostly on swimwear. The holiday collection can be found here. However, I'm not complaining. Who doesn't want to look great and stylish in a bikini or swimsuit? There's so many different prints that aren't available elsewhere and they suit many moods and characters from a floral grunge look, to edgy aztec to girly floral. With River Island, there's something for everyone and you're bound to find something no matter what your style is. Another thing I love about the bikini's from RI is that the majority feature a padded, busty top to give you that extra little lift which is fabulous for people like me with not much in the chest area. 

Prints are a great way to liven up an outfit and bring out character. They don't have to be expensive but can make a huge difference and floral and palm ones, especially are brilliant for Summer. Look out for pieces that are bold, eye-catching and unique and you're bound to make a statement. 

Jordan x

Garden Party Ootn

The Sun is eventually starting to make an appearance here in the North-East. Over the past couple of weeks the weather has been glorious here! So, what better way to say hello to the Summer than to go to a garden party? This weekend, I attended one with lots of my amazing friends. I had a fab time and enjoyed spending time with the people I love. 

Dress-Topshop

Unfortunately, this colour is no longer available at Topshop but other colours in similar styles can be found here

I opted for a maxi dress as it wasn't a formal event but I still wanted to dress up. It was far too hot for jeans/pants and my legs were too sunburnt for shorts or a short dress so I thought a maxi dress would be perfect. The colour itself isn't very summery or bright but I picked this up in the sale a while ago and the material is very airy therefore great for Summer.

I paired it with some studded black dolly shoes from Primark, a long necklace and some big sunglasses because nothing says Summer like big sunglasses! 

As the night went on, obviously the temperatures fell but the length of the dress kept me at a nice temperature whereas I'd be too cold in anything shorter. Later on, though, I did add a long sleeved denim jacket from Primark which went really nice. Denim jackets go wonderfully with maxi dresses and really compliment them. Another of my Summer staples!

Jordan x

Beginning Boutique Wishlist

So, recently I found this online store from another fashion blogger and I'm in love. Their pieces are so unique and they're exactly what I love. There's a mixture of two pieces, pastels, prints and loads of other items. The best part is they're all affordable too!

I really don't know how this store isn't ridiculously popular all over the world because they have some gorgeous things. Therefore, here is my wish list showing the top pieces I want (perhaps need) from Beginning Boutique.

Coat £48.93

First, is this gorgeous coat. I love pastels right now because they're so summery and cute. I've been trying to wear more colours lately, too, so that I actually look female. This coat is so feminine and pretty. It'd work great with some mom or boyfriend jeans or you could dress it up and wear it with a white bodycon dress and strappy sandal heels.

Sunglasses £21.96

Ever since I saw Daphne Groeneveld wearing a pair of these sunglasses in the Dior Addict advert, I craved them. Like the coat, they're feminine and girly but also add a bit of sass. The Dior glasses I originally wanted were way out of my price range so to find some beautiful ones which were inexpensive was amazing.

Dress £46.73

This dress is my idea of a perfect daytime dress. It combines pastels and print which are two of my favourite styles this Summer. It's girly, bright and vibrant and I love the little cut out in the middle which gives it edge and flare. This would be perfect with some chunky sandals  or flatforms for a day out shopping in the town.

Hat £26.94

I'm so in love with these floppy hats this Summer and this pink one is to die for! Like what could be better than a PINK, huge hat?! These are another of my summer staples and I've been lusting over them every time I've walked into H&M or Topshop. I've only ever seen black ones and I loved them but when I saw this pink one, I fell in love. It's so bright and summery. It'd be perfect to wear on the beach with a bikini and a kaftan.

Two-piece £52.23

I don't actually own any two-pieces but I've noticed them coming into fashion recently. I'm not quite sure if I can pull them off but I loved the print of this one. I really liked the shape of the crop top, too which makes it unique and look expensive. I really want a two-piece and I am still unsure but this one really did catch my eye.

Crop top £30.24

Last on my wish list is this baby pink crop top (yes pastels again!). I also noticed that the model's wearing the cat-eye sunglasses with this top too. This top is really cute and girly and could go with so many things. This top has potential to match any dress code whether it be casual, where you could pair it with some high waisted jeans or shorts, or dressy, where you could pair it with a lace A-line skirt like pictured. This top is great for any occasion which is why I love it because you want to make the most of your money and get as much use out of it as possible!

There were so many more things on my wish list but unfortunately I couldn't post them all as I didn't want to bore you so you'll just have to go check them out for yourself at Beginning Boutique and let me know what's on your wish list! x

Prom!

Finally!! I've been so excited to do this blog post. Yesterday was my school prom and it was amazing. It was a great time spent with wonderful people and it was a nice chance to say goodbye to most as it was the last time seeing everyone. So here's some pictures from start to finish of the big day!

So, I'd already gotten my tan, eyelashes, nails and eyebrows done 2 days prior to prom so I was already set with those. I woke up at 7am with excitement! This was my beautiful hair done by my Godmother. I wanted to go for a messy, boho kind of look. It took many hair grips but the final product was worth it. I also wore a flower hairband from Primark which was £3.

At 3.30pm, the MUA arrived to do my makeup. I went for a nude look with lots of contouring to make my face look more defined. She done an amazing job and it was well worth the money. I felt like a model! If anyone is interested in the MUA, her website is thebeautybom.com and she's wonderful! She's done work for the likes of Vogue and celebrities.

This was my embellished clutch bag from Very and it was £25. It took me so long to find a bag that went perfectly with my dress!

 I went to my friend Beth's house for pre-prom buck's fizz and photos at 5pm. My wonderful boyfriend and prom date had gotten me this beautiful corsage which went perfectly with my dress. It made me look so elegant. In this picture, I'm also wearing 2 rings which are both from Pandora.

We went to the school for 6pm to get picked up by the coaches at 6.30. The prom was a surprise one so we had no idea where we were going until we actually got there. We ended up going to Beamish hotel in the end. The venue was rather small but it didn't spoil the atmosphere. We were so lucky for the nice weather, also, but it was far too hot and I spent the majority of the time complaining about how hot I was.

I was so in love with my dress. I chose it because it was different and I knew no-one else would have this dress. As I said before, I went for a boho chic look. The dress was a vintage pink and featured two slits at the front which meant that my legs showed whilst I walked and I felt so sassy hahaha. It was a beautiful piece though and I hope I can wear it again or find it a home where someone will love it as much as I do. You can buy this dress from Needle and Thread (also available on Asos) for £200. It is also available in white.

Here's some pictures from the event. It finished at around 11.30 and it was an amazing night. We danced, talked and laughed and it was so fun! 

Obviously I was fascinated by the slits in the dress and thought I was Angelina Jolie.

Once we got home from prom, the girls got ready and we went straight back out to the after party. I wore a Topshop dress (£38) covered by a cardigan from H&M (£8). I had to wear a cardigan over as the dress was awkward and flipped up at the back and showed everything. My feet were so sore off wearing heels at prom too so I just wore my converse. The after party was fab. I didn't get too drunk as I hate being out of control (and liquid calories but yeah) but I still enjoyed the night. I ended up dancing until 4am until I fell asleep on the host's sofa (oops). There were also tears as I'm a typical female and get worked up over anything and overthink EVERYTHING. 

Overall, I had an amazing night and I can't believe it's over. I hope to keep seeing these people who made my night so amazing because I love them all. I'll definitely never forget this night.

June Favourites

I can't believe it's July already! I swear June only lasted like 3 seconds and Christmas was yesterday. So, with the Sun approaching, I thought I'd do a post on some of my Summery favourites from June...

My first June fashion favourites are stripes! I love stripes right now I'm wearing striped tees to death. I love the French look- it's so chic but easy to wear and they go with anything. I paired this striped boyfriend tee (Primark £6) with some baggy shorts and a chunky belt along with some gold jewellery. Stripes are great if you want to look casual but still fashionable.

I've been obsessed with bronzer throughout June. I'm extremely pale and don't tan so now that it's Summer, I needed to find a way to get a sun kissed look without it looking fake. This bronzer hit the spot and gave me a natural glow. I applied it just under my cheek bones, on my T-zone and under my chin to contour.

This is probably the worst picture ever but my next favourites are headpieces. I bought this headpiece from a girl on depop and I love it. I was originally going to wear it for prom but it didn't match my dress. I've seen so many celebrities wearing these headpieces and I fell in love. They're so boho chic. I'd love to be able to pull one of these off so if you can- I'm very jealous of you!

My final June favourites are skirts. These are 2 of my new skirts- both from Topshop. The behind skirt was £15 in the sale and it's an A-line skirt with a palm tree print. It's gorgeous for a casual Summer outfit as it's airy and keeps you cool. The other skirt is a patterned pelmet skirt with pockets. This one was a little more pricy at £34 but it was well worth the money, however it's very short! I'm quite self-conscious of my thighs so skirts are a great way to hide them but they look good. I can't wait to wear these pieces.